The main thing the Borderlands games are known for, besides the shooting and looting, is their hilarious dialogue. Even without an iconic funny villain like Handsome Jack, Tiny Tina's Wonderlands is no exception. Between the Dungeons and Dragons references and fourth-wall-breaking wisecracks, there is hardly a dull moment to be found in Gearbox's new co-op shooter.
Plenty of moments stand out in Tiny Tina's Wonderlands, but most memorable are the lines of dialogue that made us go from exhaling through our noses in amusement to full-on belly laughing. Here are some of our favorite, funny lines of dialogue from Tiny Tina's Wonderlands.
10 Romancing The Brighthoof Drawbridge
"Hey girl! Lookin' fine. Are those new… counterweights?"
One of the beautiful things about Tiny Tina's Wonderlands is that the player's dialogue changes subtly depending on which voice you choose for yourself. So your responses to certain scenarios have the potential to be different every time you make a new character!
Whatever voice you chose, hands down one of the funniest moments in Tiny Tina is when Valentine suggests romancing the closed drawbridge in Brighthoof in order to open the path. Our favorite response to this situation has to be the line above, delivered in the "Gruff" player voice.
9 Skeletons Lamenting Their Death
"Don't let them turn my skull into a mug!"
All the dialogue that the skeleton baddies scream with Skeletor-like shrillness is bound to get a chuckle out of you. Some honorable mentions include, "My foot bone is going to connect with your ass bone" or "I have so much to unlive for!" Perhaps the most niche one references the ever-trendy skull mug gracing the shelves of Hot Topic everywhere. Sorry skeleton, how else are we supposed to make our enemies fear us as we sip our morning chai latte?
8 Old Classroom Fears Return
"My old nemesis…"
I think we can all relate to this one. Anyone who ever went to a school where teachers forced you to take turns reading out loud from a textbook knows that the only thing worse than public speaking is public reading. When Tiny Tina tells the player that they must read a scroll in order to open the passage forward, Valentine immediately replies with, "My old nemesis." When Frette asks, "Reading?," he replies, "Out loud."
7 Never Question The Bunk Master
"We- B-because… a… uh… uh, SURPRISE AMBUSH!"
Every Dungeon Master can attest to the utter panic that ensues once a player finds a crack in your campaign's internal logic. That is what cheesing is for, baby.
The moment Frette questions Tina's plan for Ksara at the Temple of Sacrifice, she springs a surprise ambush onto the player to give her time to come up with a solution. The only thing funnier than Tina improving these edits on the fly is the fact that all the adversaries in this "ambush" are named "UMM" and "AHH", as if vocalizing Tina's Bunker Master panic.
6 Change Your Entire Being
“Here’s a magickal quick-change kiosk, if you need to change anything fundamental about your entire being. It’s free, weirdly enough.”
Everybody's favorite red-haired tavern keep with a strong Minnesotan accent is just bursting with snide remarks and funny one-offs. Perhaps her best is the fourth-wall break she does when showing you around the amenities of Izzy's Fizzies for the first time. Does it make sense for a magical kiosk that can change your appearance from your nose down to your armor pattern to be free? No, but now you look cool.
5 A Farm Girl In Love
"Now I know what you’re thinking. This obsession with Alma is… unhealthy. I have no follow-up, I just know you’re thinking it.”
The side quests that begin with "A Farmer's Ardor" offer some of the most hilarious moments in Tiny Tina's Wonderlands. What is there not to love about a farm girl's quest to woo the woman of her dreams? Especially when she ends up falling in love with a goblin instead. Flora's moment of self-awareness has to be the funniest bit of this whole debacle.
4 Just Say Yes
“HERO, I’VE ONLY GOT ONE QUESTION FOR YOU. EXPLOSIONS??”
If Torgue asks you about explosions, the only thing you can say is "yes". Torgue the "bard-barian" is by far one of the funniest side characters you come across. This is not only due to the fact that he scream-talks, or that he punches his lute to self-censor himself, but, also, because he loves explosions.
3 We Saw What You Did There
“If you’d just give me a little flick in that direction, I’d be SO appreciative.”
Yes, Tiny Tina's Wonderlands. We see what you did there with "flicking" the evil magic bean towards the town of Driftwood.
It is rather impressive that the writers managed to fit a sexual innuendo on top of a fairy tale reference during this side quest. If you find a bulletin board quest to help a "magic bean," it will be worth your trouble. Aiding this not at all nefarious legume unlocks a beanstalk-infested area known as Tangledrift.
2 Never Had A Straight Thought
“You’ve never thought straight a moment in yer life OR unlife! But… thank you.”
Tiny Tina gives us the homoerotic skeleton pirate romance we never knew we needed. At the end of your adventure through Wargtooth Shallows to help Bones Three-Wood remedy his love-turn-rivalry with the pirate LeChance, you get to watch them kiss and make up. We especially appreciated this play on words when Bones Three-Wood tries to apologize for "not thinking straight" when he turned them all into skeletons.
1 Let's Blow Up The BONK-ing Ocean
"WE’RE BLOWING THAT BONKING OCEAN TO KINGDOM BONK-YOU COME! IT’S SO BEAUTIFUUUUUL! BONK YOU OCEAN, I’LL SEE YOU IN HELL!”
Well. That did not go exactly as planned. After going to all the work of bringing Torgue the half-bard from Weepwild Dankness back to Brighthoof to bless your cruddy little ship, he gets so inspired by your party's friendship that he fires Magic Missile instead. Where does he fire Magic Missile, you ask? The ocean, of course. Looks like you'll be walking.
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